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Mac Johnson, the webpage |
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The Ultimate:  It was the day before Halloween. The chill of autumn was in the
air and an early morning mist shrouded the New England landscape like fog on a Hollywood moor as I awoke. Groggy, I stumbled
down the stairs, unaware of the horror that awaited me. |
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The Penultimate Four:  One of the paramount questions facing mankind, I am told by many
in politics and the media, is “What’s the ‘fuel of the future?’” Of course, the question
is only valid if you’re idiotic enough to believe that there really should be one fuel of the future and that
we need to avoid all others as somehow being less ideal than the mythical perfect fuel of the future...  The news report was stark,
the details sketchy: a lone gunman had entered the offices of The Discovery Channel and had issued a list of demands. “Finally!”
I thought, someone else is as fed up as I am. Doubtless the gunman would now demand two things:  BP is bad – bad, bad,
bad, bad, really, awfully, deeply bad. I would call them naughty as well, but they’re British and they might
actually enjoy that. I say all this up front so that no one will think that anything I say in the rest of this article
is a defense of BP, which is bad. If we can just put aside the badness of BP for a moment, though, it might allow us to
ask a few questions that somehow went unaddressed throughout the 90-day live broadcast of the Gulf Oil Spill and Spectacle,
such as: how bad was the spill? Is there any precedent to judge its impact on that region of the Gulf? How long might
it take the area to recover biologically? Will there be irreparable long-term consequences?  Once again, a wacky, divisive,
leftist president is nationalizing industries for political gain. No, I’m not talking about Barack Obama, but
that other wacky, divisive, leftist president, Hugo Chavez. (Although I can understand how that first sentence can be confusing.)
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